It's been along...

It's been along time tak update blog kan? hehehehe sorry, too much running on my mind actually.. sebenarnya tengah buat assignment nationhood and should be submit on 14th Nov 2018, pening sangat tu yang bukak blog kejap..rindu pulak kat blog.
Oh ya, lupa nak story.. Aku sekarang study bachelor degree of biodiversity and conservation kat UTHM. Kemasukan 2/9/2018 Alhamdulillah, aku dapat jugak U yang selalu aku doakan hari2 dulu sebabnya nak dekat dengan my bby Akif  but end up, aku dapat kampus Pagoh and srsly taktahu pun ada degree kat Pagoh 😒 Masa aku dapat tahu aku dapat UTHM aku siap call my bby , excited gila weh πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ macam terharu sebab Allah dengar doa aku selama ni tapi bila dapat tahu kampus Pagoh luruh jugak hati ni. Baru nak act macam couple yang lain, selalu dating, boleh open up bila2 masa, nak gaduh pun mesti susah kan.. But still dalam Johor ,so I'm srsly grateful. Btw, masa hari pendaftaran bby datang tauuuuuu !! πŸ™ŒπŸ™†  He made 2 hours journey along to come Pagoh, thankyouu bbyπŸ’•πŸ˜Š You made  list of mylife tick✔️ing


           


28 SEPTEMBER 2018

So kali ni aku turun jb actually, pegi umah family dia. kiteorang amek bas dari bp sama2 ke Larkin.. Masa ni aku merajuk sebab dia janji kol 2 tapi mase tu bas nak gerak dah and dia tak sampai2.. dia lari gila2 masa tu sebab nak kejarkan aku, tapi sad thing was aku ignore dia hm jahatnya aku 😞 padahal masa dia lari tu aku dah terdetik dah dalam hati "Taknak lah marah kesian dia terkejar2.." tapi kenapa aku buat taktahu dengan dia masa tu srslyy tiraaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh  T_T 
I feel bad pasal diri aku, aku taktahu nak bendung cmne sebab aku takut dgn diri aku.
But then everything was fine.. aku ikut family dia pegi trip tadika ibu dia ke Zoo Johor, Perpustakaan Awam Johor and a park (i dont remember the name).. Quite fun sebab bukan selalu pegi tempat2 cmni kan? 




He's soooo cute kan in this piccccc


12 OCTOBER 2018


  This one aku turun lagi bp tapi dengan kawan2 aku, kiteorang sewa kereta pegi bp sebab nak menyoping, pastu nak jumpa my Akif ni sekali yeyyyyπŸ™†πŸ’–.. best jugak area sini.. Kawan2 aku tinggalkan aku dengan my bby kat wakaf sekolah dia, lama jugak.. Dorang pegi Muaz, guess what memasing berhabis banyak gila πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ dah 5.40 cmtu dorang still tak sampai aku risau dorang saje tinggalkan aku kat situ.. Many things kita berbual kan, bby? you thought that I'm changing but actually, im srsly stress out with this test, assignment and everything in Pagoh.😞

I bought him some food, i know live in dorm is always starving. So there's some that I bought for him, and ade jugak yang dia pesan 

"Eh buatlah senyum lain"
"Senyum lain? Mane retiii"
last2 dia tiru je ape aku buat 😹
-He's totally adorable gilaaaaaπŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ’ž-


*He done everything just to make me smile and happy, he always be my happydrugs, my happypills.. i know hurt him so much but he always pretend to smile and strong, sayang.. i really sorry, but i know my sorry is unworthy, so lets me change myself to a better me for us.* 
Keep my words forever ..InsyaAllah, peeps pls pray for me and my Akif  berkekalan to beautiful marriage yeπŸ’• May Allah bless you guys😊

My Bby Akif πŸŽ•

Him..
Maybe I'm so lucky to have him πŸ˜„
For every flaws, he accepts me for who I am.
Every time I'm looking back to the pasts, I remember I couldn't make him two because he is the only guy who love me for whole of his heart, take care of me, hold me tight when I'm nuts, never leave me, laugh over my stupid jokes(sometimes), be serious to me when I'm not in serious(always), he always think wisely about everything..like EVERYTHING..

I never feel this way, I really love him.. I love him more than anyone ever know..More than he knows :) Over years and years, we already grown up.. already 2years8months in long distance relationship with Akif..
And I guess people just saying of our bad sides to leave each others but we cannot. We just cannot.
He knows myself more than me, He knows me more than my family know me.
He like always, he makes me really into him😍

So just nak share hari tu (24/5/2018), Akif visit me and my family !! A week before dia tekad beli tiket bas ke Seremban.. Macam tak percaya dia nak datang sini mase tu. I was so excited wehhh.. Excited sebab rindu kan.. lama tak dpt jumpa.. Btw, dia datang sini tu mase begin cuti sem dia. Cuti sebulan kan.. so dia decided nak visit me.. YEAYY


*tengok ni excited betul dia siap buat story ig lagi πŸ˜‚ :


Tahun lepas Tyra berpuasa di johor dengan dia n family dia, so tahun ni Akif pula berpuasa di nismilan with my family 😊 Pegi terawih same2, kebetulan masa Akif datang tu MB nismilan yang baru pun datang surau. Bak kata Akif dia mcm langkah kanan lah. biasa lah Akif ni poyo nye tak sudah πŸ˜‚ walaupun kita jumpa sekejap tapi sangat2 bermakna untuk Tyra.
Esoknya, kami balik johor pulak.
Haa mase kat johor ni tak pernah tak best tau , kiteorg dok merayap kat bazar ramadhan kat sane hahahahaha. bazar kat sane best sangat2. Haih ape je yang tak best kat johor ni? Tell me. I bet semuanya best2πŸ™† Macam2 ade wehhhh. Makanan yang orang nogori ni tak pernah makan pun ade. 

So here, some pics as momento mase kiteorang jumpa :



CHECK THIS OUTTTTTT !!

        

   




Thats all for our last time dating ke meet eh hahaahhaha πŸ’‘
Rindu lah wehhhhh 😭 Entah bila nya dapat jumpa lagi kan? 
Akif sayang, jaga diri baik2 ye kat sana. Semoga awak bahagia selalu . Perasaan rindu kat awak ni tak mungkin akan padam sampai bila2, awak selalu buat sy tersenyum,gelak2, geli hati. yang paling penting, awak sentiasa memahami sy walaupun kita selalu gaduh sebab family .. Senyuman awak benda yang selalu sy ketagih nak tenung, lawak awak selalu buat sy geli hati, manja awak haih tak payah cakaplah lagi2 kalau tengah sakit.. Jaga diri selalu ye. Belajar rajin2 tau, sy nak datang tengok awak graduate nanti πŸ˜„πŸ™Œ Maafkan sy sebab selalu membebel kat awak, marah2 awak tak tentu pasal, maafkan sy sebab sy tak boleh berhenti rindukan awak.😿 Kalau boleh jangan lah merajuk selalu.. sy ni kejap je dah rindu awak.. hehehhehe okaylah ni. got to go ~
AssalamualaikumπŸ’•

Hell-ish


Literally, ppl would say that "Home Sweet Home", but for me......
My absence wouldn't distract anyone and nobody cares.
My presence like nothing..
Nobody would care about me.. 
Isn't it not fair for your youngest sibs to get mad? Why I can't be angry?
I have monster inside of me too. I have too. I don't even ask for many things, and why I can't get what I want to?
Question marked is everywhere. Like, I don't even cannot make my own choices.
Hey, I have passion too. I have souls and feelings too.
Dear everyone, I hope u guys know that I have feelings too..


Thank you for not listening to me,
Thank you for not care abt me,
Thank you for not give me freedom,
Thank you for caged me in hell,
Thank you for bad things you guys did to me (I might forgave you but I won't forget forever)
Thank you for make me hate myself,
Thank you for every good things u have done for me.

THANK YOU